Apathetic Overload

After a sluggish start of the week, things are starting to pickup somewhat. The past two days of work were sort of trying, having that "I wish I wasn't here at work" feeling. I can't really recall the last time I had that thought flowing throughout me, maybe I need a little vacation or some time away. Now that I have the car on the road, a little road trip might me in order, just have to come up with a plan now and figure out what I want to do.

I'm sort of counting days at work because I don't know how much longer I'll have said job. The business might be closing due to lack of monies coming in and it would be a shame should the place close. We do a lot of good and help a lot of people beat the disease of addiction and alcoholism, it just gets to me, how four owners who for the most part are way beyond well off and don't want to put money into the business to keep it going. I guess it's just me and I suppose only time will tell. I'm going to start looking for others things though, Nothing worse than having all of ones eggs in a falling basket. I just seem to be going from one day to the next, one at a time, and not really looking that far ahead into the future, seems that having gone through treatment and recovery in the past, I tend to live for the moment and not read into things as deep as I should.

The other part of my life that seems to be lagging is the one that contains that special someone. I, for the most part, gave up on seeking out the one that my life is lacking. I thought that I would just put it on the shelf for a little while and should something happen, I'd let it happen, so that's where I'm at now with that, it just bothers me every now and then that I haven't found anyone remotely close to wanting a relationship. Seems that the guys who treat women like objects, play toys, possessions and one night stands are getting all the ladies. Can you explain that one to me ladies.??

Again, the ranting that is Shawn.

Pleasant Nothingness

I just love weekends, even more so when I have nothing to do. Well, I must rephraise that one, there are things I could be doing; like cleaning or laundry, but choose to take the day and just bumb around. I don't mind just wasting the day away here at my local Starbucks just writing, downloading, listening to music, just basically whatever.

It's a good thing every now and then to just get away and do some things that relax me and make me not think about some of the things that are going on in my life. It's always a pleasure to have some "me time" and leave the thoughts of work and whatnot at the office. Since getting a car on the road again, I find myself getting out a bit more and exploring a few new places and things to do. One of the biggest things I've been doing is trying to find new and different places to eat, granted I love to eat, it's cool to experience new foods and tastes. Actually trying to think of somewhere to go for dinner this evening, but as usual, something off the hip will come up and I'm sure I'll have a great time making the best of where I wind up. Oh well, off to do nothing.....

Time Well Spent

Just sitting here at 1:15am listening to the new Dream Theater Disk "Octavarium" and thought I would post a little something before throwing "Queen of The Damned" into my bedside DVD player and drift off into the land of nightmares. Not really being the big blogger myself, I came across this site through a friend of mine and thought it might me a neat idea to toy around with and hone my writting skills a little more.

Kind of an uneventful evening, as if that is something unusual, but it was nice to really have nothing to do this evening but hang around watching Season Two of Chapelle's Show. It was nice to just hang, listen to some tunes, watch a little DVD, then back to a little more music and guitar practicing before I get some rest for the evening. I'm so glad that today was my late day at work and I'll only be working till 5pm tomorrow then the weekend hits.

For those of you that don't know me, or anything about myself, I'm a recovering addict, and am currently working in a rehab where I try and do what I can to help those that suffer the same problems that have plagued me in the past. I don't really make a boatload of money at the moment, but I make enough to live okay and help those that seek said help. As long as my bills are paid and I have some money in my wallet, I'm usually a happy guy, It's so un-old-Shawn. It's all about change right..?? Well, something in my changed since getting clean and I must say that it was for the better because I can wake up today and not have to worry about doing the wrong things in life just to make it through the day, I wouldn't trade that feeling for anything on this Earth.

With that being said, I will post this small entry and try to get myself some rest so I'm not totally drained for my Friday. I'm sure that there will be more of these postings in the near future and I'll really look forward to writing some of them down, I'll try not to make them bland and flavourless.

Enjoy All.